Monday, June 22, 2015

Not pretty

I am writing a response to a video by nymisha. Go check out the brilliant video here. (I honestly would like to live in your head for a day, nymisha)

I know I am not pretty. I don't turn heads that are looking for long, dewy maidens whose laughter sparkles like soap bubbles I used to blow when I was young. I can't throw my head and toss my hair and catch the sun in my eyes because my eyes are like burnt charcoal. 

No, I am not pretty. 
Pretty is such a sharp word. A word that sounds like splinters. Like hard, cold, lifeless glass that pierces your soul. 

Pretty. Such a petty word.

No. I will not let me be defined by a word like pretty. I refuse to be known by such a heartless word. I am not a china doll.

So no, I am not just pretty.
 I am the sun the moon the stars. 
I am a monster.
A hideous one.
I am beautiful.
I am a Phoenix.
I may burn down, but then I will burn you down with me.
But I will rise from my ashes.

So, call me anything you want to. Just not pretty.

Friday, June 12, 2015


one day,
she dragged a scissor through her veins
 sucked her blood out
and spat it out.

she let her heart be as empty as she thought it was.

Saturday, June 6, 2015


And this is when I cut you off.
Because I can't hurt you anymore.
Because I can't hurt me any more.

We both know how it ends,
Me grasping at straws,
You clinging on to your raft.
Both of us sinking.

So let us leave.