Sunday, September 15, 2013

Alice In Wonderland

I am lost. I didn't fall through a hole. I didn't follow a rabbit. A cold breeze brought me here. I could recognize it but then it was a memory from a far past. I know not what it is. I need to follow it. I go through a black hole which seems to be its source. Such a beautiful one.Glistening, glittering. I was in my land. I was in my Wonderland. Everything was a half-truth here. Everything was a half lie here. Nothing was complete. Nothing began. Nothing had ever ended. I know this place. It's a safe haven for me. It won't give me away.It was the one home I have. 
Ah, that breeze is back again. It chills me, it freezes me. But I know the feeling it was bringing along with it. It seems to make happy. So very happy. I have forgotten its name. But I know I remember it. 
I suddenly started. Turn around and find a pair of eyes looking at me. I look at them. I am mesmerized by them. They are brown, liquid like. Velvet eyes I want to reach out to. Eyes like never before. But they have started to look away. Those are moving away. They are running away from me. I realize a need for them to stay. I can't breath. I knew I could never catch up. Those  moving to fast. But I blindly ran up the forest. I vainly try to pursue them. I am too slow. Panting, tripping, I come to a slow stop. It is too late. The golden forests are empty but for the silently whispering trees.
                                    
Something is running down my cheek. Tears. I never cried before. I never cared enough to cry. 
I make my way through the forest. I knew my way here. It seemed as though I had come here with a map etched in my mind. I knew this place in my heart. I know that a little farther ahead rests a a shore. A small patch of sand decorated with  millions of glittering shells. The forest slowly receded. It cleared out. I rapidly suck my breath in. It is so much prettier than the way I knew it. Than the way I had dreamed about it.I set myself down on the prickly sand. It hurt me. It hurt me quite a lot. 
I don't know how long I had stayed there before I feel somebody's searching gaze. I pray that it is my velvet eyes before I turn around. It is not. However I don't mind these either. These eyes don't want to hurt me. I invite them to join me in my desolate and yet comforting dwelling. These eyes are different from the first ones. They want to come. But they don't. They too start to run away. 
I somehow know I need to keep moving. I am sweating. I am tired. I keep losing myself. I fall. I see glimpses of some other eyes. Some that were hiding dark, alien secrets. Some I knew so well but still didn't know at all. Some that were hurting themselves and hurting me. A set trying to show me the way. A lying pair too. I realize that no one was really staying. I feel a lance of pain shoot through my chest.I am hurting. I am in pain. I do not have anybody with me. I am all alone.
I pick up a twig and write in big, crude letters with tears clouding my vision,
'Please stay. Don't leave me alone. Please help.'
With a jolt I realize the breeze has stopped. I suddenly know its name too. It was known as hope.

4 comments:

  1. Replies
    1. Thanks. Alice is always the charecter I relate to.

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  2. Wow, this was great. So visual! I loved how you used short sentences and you didn't feel the need to over-describe everything. It kept me reading.


    www.alicekouzmenkowriting.blogspot.com

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